Things Missed

Hey Everyone,

So a few weeks ago I took my awesome nephew to the park. As he was swinging on the swing I had a deep thought about how my Mom is not here to see this. When moments like this occur it just makes you want to cry. The simple fact is is that she is not physically here. She's not here to push this awesome little guy on the swing. I've spent all my wishes in life wishing she was physically here, and all I'm left wish is wishes.

If I could tell my Mom something it would be I wish you could see the amazing life that you left behind. How your grandson is such a creative and great little guy. And I wish you didn't leave us...

What is going on....

Hey Everyone,

So I'm just busy receiving letters for the Rachel Ray show. Lots of friends have written letters, thank-you guys soooo much for writing those letters! Now just a few more letters and I'll be set to send everything out in hopes to get on the show, wish me luck guys!

A Thought

Sometimes I think about how great it would be to run away from all of this grief. As much as it gets easier, it would seem easier to run away. But there is something stubborn inside of me that won't let me because I know I would hate myself if I ran. So I'm stubbornly holding myself from running away. What an odd thought.

Therapeutic Poetry; A Cornucopia of Lava-Hot Pop-Tarts

Hey Everyone,

I came across this poem from my college's "Wildwood Journal", which is a collaboration of students work. This poem is funny, but I really like it. I hope you guys like it too!

A Cornucopia of Lava-Hot Pop-Tarts

By: Gareth Gebhardt

I am exactly everything:

My parents' two halves,

weeds, stars, and atoms,

unimaginable size and mass,

scratches of graphite, sparks of arson,

and a shrinking ozone layer.

I am the sharp teeth of fresh lies,

peroxide in the wound, fish in barrels,

an uncaged child who rambles

in a blue summer

(and all the visible spectrum of the seasons between.)

I am forgetting. I am sprinting, I am stretching, I am flexing,

I am

discarded bubblegum pop song

on the bottom of a shoe

my fingers, they roll with god and darwin,

I speak in robot voices to converse

with Stephen Hawkins, Carl Sagan,

an I get high and write

broadway hits where each day

is a big bang, or a hiccup.

I am the playground bully,

the downtown junkie,

bugs bunny, Wayne Brady, the lunch lady,

Nick Sarkozy, old Humphrey Bogey,

and sometimes, I admit, a soup nazi.

I am electric-slide willow tree

in Jimi Hendrix's stratocaster breeze,

and swine flu trembles like a peon at my feet,

for I am the velociraptor influenza pandemic,

inventor of the wheel, founder of parliament funkadelic.

The first one to put scotch on ice,

Barack Obama asks me for bedroom advice.

I am a hundred-dollar frying pan from Williams Sonoma,

a decorated general of Salvation Army flannel,

master interior designer with milk crates,

duct tape, and low-cost Swedish furniture.

My triumphant mixtapes are commissioned by

the London Symphony Orchestra

I am grand master champion of Monopoly and Where's Waldo?

It does not rain usually,

until I am under cover, and if

I am patient for the precise amount of time,

traffic lights turn green when I snap my fingers.

And still I sit up nights, wondering

if I am doing this right.

Important Quote

"Remember, depression is an illness." - From film: " More Than Sad: Teen Depression" by: The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

I've Lost Count of Weeks!

Hey Everyone,

I hope everyone is enjoying the spring weather! I wanted to mention that there has been a lot about suicide in the news lately. Bullying has been discussed on many news station. I first would like to say I am very sorry for the family for their loss. Their child can not be replaced. I wish there could have been another way that bullying in school and the severity of its effect can be came out openly to the public. Though I am glad many people are beginning to see the severity of bullying. I hope the right action is taken in schools, and improve children's lives.

My biggest push so far has been asking people to write letters to Rachel Ray. It's a big dream, but I'm trying to make it come true. I've also been getting into more of a healthy eating habit, though I can't say no to my ice-cream! I'm moving working out for preparation for the walk to the top of my priority list! Thank-you all again for your continued support. I have to give a shout out to Jenny for telling people about my blog, thank-you so much for letting people know about this. Your support is very much appreciated! Together we're saving lives!